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Wetting Adjectives and Arcs

By BitterGrey

WARNING: Some of the practices touched upon in this article might include a risk of urinary tract infections (UTIs). These include failure to clear urine from the urethra (leaving a pathway for bladder infection) and potential backflow into the kidneys (possibly leading to kidney infections that require immediate medical intervention).

It has been said that "Eskimos have 300 words for snow." This is probably an exaggeration, but importance is often reflected by the language. Diapers and wetting are of wide importance to ABDLs. Having more formally-developed language for wetting might enhance our discussion of practices and (perhaps indirectly) enhance our experiences.


Two notable axes relate to the level of influence attempted (automatic or contested) and on the level of awareness before and afterward (surprising and inferred). Clearly, these would be matters of degree, with adjectives describing some wettings more than others. Specific wettings might differ due to circumstances, and longer-term shifts might develop over time.

Automatic or contested: A distinctive characteristic of the types of uncontrolled (or less controlled) wetting is the level of conscious involvement. A fully automatic wetting would be without conscious intervention. The experience would be that of a passive spectator feeling the urination process, with no effort to either initiate or delay urination. This experience might be similar to that of a newborn or infant. Noticeably, it might lack the initial 'clamping' of urethra in response to the bladder's initial contraction. This serves to delay urination until the sphincter is intentionally relaxed. (The similar 'clamping' after urination, which serves to clear urine from the urethra, might also be notable. If it becomes absent, the residual urine might become a pathway for bladder infections.)

In contrast, the wetting might be actively contested by actively attempting to delay urination, perhaps to fail. This experience might be similar to that of a toddler starting potty training. Some ABDLs might enjoy the struggle and loss of the contest more than the actual wetting. They would be wetting helplessly, and actively so. Others might enjoy feeling the fatigued sphincters spasm. (In males, nearby muscular spasms are intense sensations, including orgasms and the scrotum's response to getting kicked in one's balls.) Some ABDLs might disappointingly be able to 'win' the contest and control urination. Unlike the little toddlers, adults trying to develop this type of uncontrolled wetting might have successfully eliminated the reflexive wetting of their infancy, and have been developing the muscles and practices of holding urination for decades. The pressure of the contest might drive urine into the kidneys, bring a risk of UTIs.

Flooding and dribbling: Being automatic or contested often correlates with wetting volume and frequency. The urgency of contested wettings often involves a full bladder, which may result in flooding (a large and rapid wetting). In contrast, flooding might make leaks more likely, which might cause a lack of faith in the diaper, which might make wettings less automatic. (Wettings might also be less automatic if a diaper feels as if it is near capacity, and ready to leak.) In contrast, frequent, low-volume dribbling might be more automatic, which circularly might promote frequent dribbling. Short term, frequency might play a role in contested wettings, as the relevant muscles fatigue. However, this might result in more developed muscles (and better urinary control) long term.

Surprising and inferred: Separate from being automatic or contested, a wetting might be surprising at the moment, or only inferred afterwards. A fully surprising wetting would be without the warning signs of the bladder filling, etc., beforehand. In turn, if the wetting isn't noticed at the time, or forgotten afterwards, it might only be inferred: The diaper is now wet, so wetting must have occurred at some point. This experience might be familiar to adults who have been going to the toilet for decades and so no longer remembers specific trips, except for the growing pile of diapers in the pail. In this, it might be more similar to the diaper-use experience of the mommy or daddy.

Again, individual wettings and how they were perceived would vary due to circumstances, etc. For example, a distracted ABDL might become aware that an automatic wetting is occurring. Hoping to enjoy the next one, the ABDL might pay careful attention, only for the next wetting to be less automatic due to the focused attention. Variations might also be conditional. For example, wetting might be more automatic, and harder to infer, if the diaper is already wet.

Finally, these six words clearly don't encompass every aspect of wetting. In particular, the list of wetting experiences from specific anatomical variations might be as long as the list of relevant specific anatomical variations.


However, even just these four items of vocabulary might enhance not only how we discuss wetting, but how we experience it. Those dabbling with control loss would have the language to choose whether they wanted the potentially intense experience of a contested wetting or the milder reflexive wetting. There also might be less of a surprise when both retraining efforts appear to stall.

Control loss-contest-flooding-control arc: Contested wetting, after all, might be similar to the toddler's experience during potty training, which resulted in adult control. Such is the irony of the pursuit of precontinence. Assuming that the contest initially involved some lack of control, it would be reasonable to expect muscles to develop, the urine-holding practices used during the contest to be re-enforced, etc. This might eliminate any initial lack of control. The initiation of this arc depends on the means used to decrease control initially. Engaging in contested flooding without such a loss of control would simply result in better urinary control and a risk of UTIs.

Dribbling-automatic-inferred arc: Some seeking to develop more automatic wetting might be frustrated that their untraining efforts aren't resulting in automatic wetting more often. In truth, they might be dribbling more automatically yet noticing it less often. Their training would be progressing from reducing conscious involvement to reducing conscious awareness. Alternatively, their more habitual wetting might also be less memorable. The sampling bias might result in the perception that wettings are not becoming more automatic. Furthermore, they might attribute their diaper's wetness to any remembered, automatic wettings, and so not infer the other wettings. This might be unsatisfactory: They might be trying to reproduce the infant's diaper-use experience, and end up with the parents diaper-use experience. The initiation of this arc might start with trusting diapers and other protective layers enough to wet easily and often. This may involve practices similar to those used in overcoming shy/overtrained bladders. Wetting might become more automatic, more habitual, and less notable over time.

Of course, just as there might be other adjectives important to the discussion of wetting control, as well as other potential retraining arcs. In particular, being aware of the above arcs might affect how you experience them. Those on the control loss-contest-flooding-control arc arc might expect it to be transient and so avoid disappointment. Those on the dribbling-automatic-inferred arc might expect inferred wettings, and so avoid disappointment. Still others might leverage these awareness into something completely different. This different arc might require - and circularly be discussed with - more developed wetting language.

- Updated:19 July 2020  1st:18 July 2020     

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