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Understanding Infantilism (.org)

The biography of Kent Perry

An accomplished actor, who goes by "Kent Perry" among ABDLs, has played a remarkable role in the development of the ABDL community. Through personal ads and mail, he built a circle of contacts. Due to closeted natures and acidic newsprint, the records of the early history of the community are partial. Other circles might have formed prior to or separately from Kent's. However, Kent's ads were clearly influential and possibly were the starting point for what finally became the ABDL community.

The following is an autobiographical account. Its accuracy has not been confirmed. Identifying information may have been changed or removed.

I remember the moment very clearly. I was standing to the right of my mother who was diapering my recently born brother on her bed. I was almost five years old and it was as though a light went off in my little head: I wanted to wear diapers again! I wanted to be a baby again! From that moment on, I spent my childhood and teenage years creating and making diapers and plastic pants. I used towels, old pillow cases and anything else I could find as diapers and cut plastic to form pants with which to cover my diapers, and even though this was a crude recreation, it excited me like nothing else. I collected diaper pins, baby bottles and pacifiers, most likely left over from my younger brother, and kept all of my bounty in a cardboard box which I hid in various closets and in my playhouse. The playhouse was a room behind our garage, which was used mainly by me. I used this room to stage Halloween haunted houses and other theatrical events. At one point I dug a whole in my father's lawn and buried my baby gear about ten inches below his prized lawn in a cardboard box. I was afraid that his mower would find its way into my secret hole each time he mowed the grass. One day it did, and he was not happy! I don't remember exactly when I wet my "diapers" for the first time, but it was probably around age seven or eight, and I do remember the euphoric feeling when I filled my diaper. I should add here that my family was very conservative and my childhood was absolutely a happy and content one. I was either in school, church or at a cub/boy/explorer scout meeting most of the time. I was popular in school and an officer in all the best clubs in school. Summers were spent at a boy's camp.

By the time I was in high school I was wearing my baby creations almost every night, even though I shared a room with my brother. He caught me a couple of times, but had no idea what I was wearing. I was also buying toddler plastic pants in Woolworth's, a store downtown, into which I could barely squeeze, but this was an improvement over my homemade plastic pants. I remember the day I purchased my first pair and how hard my heart was pounding; it was possibly the most exciting purchase of my life. I continued this during my college years, and began ordering diapers (cloth, as there were no disposables then) and even ordered rubber pants from a source in the back of a muscle magazine. They were not helpful, and I was quickly back to plastic.

People often ask me when this activity became sexual. For one thing I was a very late developer. No one ever told me about the "birds and the bees" and I didn't discover masturbation until I was age nineteen and only then by accident. I wasn't absolutely certain what "sex" really meant until I was in collegeā€¦no kidding. So, for me my diaper wearing was always my idea of sexual activity, even though I certainly didn't pin the word "sex" onto it when I was a child. But I did find it enormously exciting on many levels.

I spent two years in the Navy on active duty and kept diapers and plastic pants in a rental locker in the Norfolk, Virginia, YMCA. I rented a room there each weekend when I didn't have duty and spent as much time as possible in diapers. This was the first time that I wore them in public under my clothing, rather than just at night. I also became very brave and wore them on my ship, electing to sleep in my office rather than in my assigned cot. In my office I had privacy and kept a mattress filed away just below the gunnery records. I also discovered, during this period, that I really got turned on by taking the chance of someone "seeing" me in my diapers, by walking, only diapered, to the bathroom of the YMCA (there was only one per floor as I remember) to brush my teeth and wash up before bed. Several times I was discovered and at least twice I was invited back to the room of a Marine (thank goodness for the Marines, as they are much more adventurous as a group, than members of the other services in my experience) to inspect, to re-diaper me and more. These young marines were so interested and fascinated that anyone would still be in diapers. I loved this attention, of course.

I moved to New York City in January of 1968 where I began a career in the theatre. There I was able to cruise the dirty book stores every chance I got, which was often, looking for any reference to diapers, being a baby again or anything related. There were a plethora of dirty book stores at that time; they lined both sides of 42nd Street between Seventh and Eighth Avenues, and continued up Eighth Avenue for blocks, so I had a lot of stores to visit. I learned quickly that a few specialized in unusual kinks, and those I visited most often. I was also a constant visitor to the several libraries in the city where I researched infantilism. I found several sources, "Patterns of Psychosexual Infantilism" for example, but nothing particularly current or close to what I was doing and feeling. I also visited London, Paris, Rome and Munich during this time looking for sources. I found nothing during all this time, but continued buying supplies wherever I could find them. Sears was selling many incontinence types of pants and diapers and I think I ordered them all. I was also visiting surgical supply stores. I found one on the upper west side of Manhattan where the female owner not only suggested new types of diapers and plastic pants, but asked that I try them on for her inspection. Looking back, I think she enjoyed this a bit too much, but then so did I. I also spent time in public changing rooms in several department stores in New York City, something we no longer have. There would be maybe six to ten men trying on pants and suits in these rooms, with no privacy what-so-ever, and I enjoyed trying on three or more pairs of pants, each time exposing, briefly, my diapers and plastic pants. No one seemed to notice during any of these excursions, I found to my dismay.

So, I was having fun, but I was very lonely. I knew I couldn't be the only person doing this. I knew there had to be others out there, although the fetish literature I was viewing did not reflect my interest in any way. I was finally free of roommates in late 1970 and underground newspapers became very popular and they began publishing personal ads, more often than not dealing with fetishes, which no one before had published. Each week new boundaries were crossed and people with unusual kinks burst out of their closets it seemed. It was the 70s and sexual freedom was everywhere. I took a deep breath and decided to place an ad sometime around the beginning of 1971 I remember. I chose a newspaper as far away from me as possible, the "LA Free Press," which was printing these personal ads out of Los Angeles. I sent them my ad, which was rather generic and innocent, asking that people contact me at my newly rented postal box (for protection) and sent my ad with payment off to Los Angeles. I was very nervous. I received a reply quickly and opened the envelope to read a terse note from a woman who was seemed to be shocked that I'd place an ad to have "sex with a baby." I was horrified, as that was not at all what I intended, of course, or what my ad expressed. I sent her a quick explanation, which she accepted (sending me a note of apology) and my first ad was published.

The day I received my first responses was earth shaking for me. I think I got three or four letters forwarded to me and I rushed home (luckily only a block away) to rip them open. I found letters from three or four men telling me that they never thought they would ever see an ad like mine which matched their interest so exactly. They all thanked me for being the first to have the guts to do this. I made three or four new friends and I was energized and excited, placing more ads, both in this publication and in "The Advocate," a gay paper and later in both "Screw" and "Fetish Times." I received more and more responses and I introduced people to each other during this period. In several cases people lived in the same neighborhood, never thinking they'd find a new friend so close. Our little community grew and grew during the early seventies.

I should mention two people whom I met, actually the first and the second. From my second ad in the "Los Angeles Free Press" I heard from an eighteen year old male from San Francisco who just happened to be in New York City to audition for the original Broadway production of JESUS CHRIST, SUPERSTAR. He was staying half a block from my previous residence with a friend and he asked me to meet him at this apartment, which I agreed to do. I approached the door with anticipation and rang the bell; he opened it and was wearing a diaper and plastic pants and nothing more. My mouth hung open, I remember! Not only was he very handsome, but he was the first person I saw in my life wearing a diaper other than myself in a mirror, or someone in an incontinent ad. I can't begin to relate how exciting this was. His name was Willie Windsor and even though he didn't get the part of Jesus in the new musical, he was chosen to replace the leading character in the then current Broadway musical HAIR, where he remained employed for several years. That evening after the initial shock of seeing someone else wearing what I had spent most of lifetime wearing and hiding, we became fast friends. That evening we went to Central Park where he removed all his clothes and walked around for an hour or so wearing only a diaper and plastic pants. I followed him, way behind, carrying his clothes. I was in shock and totally out of my comfort zone, but amazed that no one really noticed him or at least reacted as they had. This was the beginning of many exploits with Mr. Windsor. We remained good friends for about twenty years and then he disappeared, until sometime around 2005, he resurfaced in Phoenix living full time and out in public as a baby girl. He had discarded most of his adult clothing and walked the streets in baby dress with diapers underneath. He attracted the media and was the star of many YouTube videos. Sadly, he was found dead in his apartment a couple of years later.

The second person I met was a very popular man named John C. He is also deceased, but he answered the ad which I placed in "The Advocate," a gay paper. He was eager to meet me as he too had never met anyone doing what he also had done for many years, so he was kind enough to send me a round trip air ticket so that I could fly to Sarasota, where he lived. As I was a very poor actor at this point, I accepted his offer and off I flew. We spent a long weekend mainly on a beautiful sailboat in the Gulf of Mexico, wearing nothing but diapers. It was pure heaven until I became seasick and then spent two days ill in his bed. John remained a dear friend and was extremely active hosting parties and gatherings in his beautiful home for many, many years. He is missed by many.

Gradually many of us were able to meet in person which helped establish our community. Two of the most important men during this period became known to us. One was Eugene C. and the other was Thomas S. Both, it turned out, lived in or near San Francisco. Gene C. established a club which he called Lil' Wrangler where he not only sold pictures of young men (legal age of course) diapered. He also had a mailing list and held parties in his home for his friends and folks who subscribed to his pamphlet which he published and were members of his club. He was a wonderful man and we became very good friends. Unfortunately he became ill with heart problems in his late fifties, I believe, and passed away. He wrote me a long letter the morning he died, giving me advice and encouragement.

Mr. S., whom I shall refer to as Tommy, became an acquaintance around 1976 and we got to know each other well when he traveled to New York City several times on business. He was quite conservative in dress and appearance, married with two children, but his imagination and ideas were quite the opposite; I don't think I've ever met anyone who comes close to his adventurous and liberated activity. In 1979 Gene C. was hosting Saturday afternoon gatherings at his house with a strictly invited guest list. Tommy was not invited to these parties, or at least was not invited at this point; he might have attended in the beginning, but must have rubbed [Gene] the wrong way, as they were no longer friends. One afternoon Tommy called me, as he often did, bemoaning the fact that no one seemed to like him, particularly [Gene]. I already knew this having heard from Gene as well. I flippantly told Tommy that what he needed to do was to start his own club so that people would have to come to him. He was immediately excited by this idea and called me several days later telling me he was going to do exactly that, start a club. As we all know, he began DPF, or Diaper Pail Fraternity (later to change its name to Diaper Pail Friends) in late 1979, with the first issue in the fall of that year. There were eleven original members, but this grew and grew and was the most important way for folks around the world to reach each other through correspondence and phone calls. His publication, which was issued quarterly, featured news articles, product reports, pictures and first and second person stories. DPF hosted many parties, both local and national, attracting many, many members of our community. The parties which often lasted for a long weekend, included visits to cultural sights in San Francisco, restaurants, hikes in the mountains as well as the beach, with cook-outs. There were also parties in his home where the food was catered. Most of these events took place in the eighties and nineties. There were several large events planned in places such as Las Vegas and Russian River which had to be canceled for one reason or another. The computer came along, of course, and DPF tried to encompass this amazing instrument, and was successful for a period. Toward the end of its life, DPF and Tommy seemed to make enemies for various reasons, such as not sending purchases on time or at all, not providing refunds for returned items, etc. I'm not sure what would be considered the date of DPF's demise. During its heyday it certainly provided a forum which helped hundreds and hundreds of people, particularly before the use of the computer.

There were regional directors of DPF and I was the regional director of the New York City area for a time. While in this capacity I was able to give two parties at a wonderful dive club in New York City on Second Avenue called Baby Land, which attracted between forty and fifty participants. The New York City press found out about the second and sent reporters to cover our party, but my partner at the door was able to keep them out and ensure our privacy.

There were many other organizations during the late seventies and early eighties which helped our community. One woman who played a role was Florence who lived outside San Francisco. I visited her in her home when she was just starting out by making adult baby clothes. She was a lovely woman and subsequently had her own club, although it remained small compared to DPF. I did very much enjoy meeting her.

Due to the computer, as well as a permissive sexual climate perhaps, our community has grown by leaps and bounds all around the world. Other than the computer, the other event which has contributed to our community, is the availability of the disposable diaper. These became more and more popular as styles were introduced during the last part of the twentieth century. Many of us actually preferred disposable diapers and switched to them as soon as they were available. Others continued to be partial to cloth diapers with baby pins and plastic or (when available) rubber pants. It is good that we have both options these days. I often hear folks compare plastic backed disposables with cloth backed ones, but before the prevalence of disposable diapers, the debate centered on whether one preferred Curity diapers or those made of birdseye material. There was also a small group who preferred a triangular diaper with only one pin holding it together in the center. This wasn't easy to pull off, and most of us wore two pins, one of each side of our cloth diapers.

We now have many individuals and companies making baby furniture, as well as clothing, strollers, car seats and other equipment "baby" items in adult sizes. It is certainly a good time to be an Adult Baby or Diaper Lover! One can only wonder what the future holds.

I have continued my personal AB/DL/Daddy activity as well as meeting others in small gatherings, organized munches, large parties and conventions. This activity and sharing of knowledge and experiences will only increase and I wish I could be around a hundred years from now to see where we have gotten, but alas, that isn't possible. I am now in my early seventies and I can honestly say that putting on a diaper gives me very much the same excitement as it did when I was six years old. I continue to see this fetish or activity as a "bonus," and one which has given me a great deal of pleasure.

-Kent Perry

Last Update: 3 Jan 2015 | First: 3 Jan 2015

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