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Understanding Infantilism (.org)

Ageplay

By BitterGrey

For discussion, let's say that you attended two adult parties, both featuring cartoons and coloring books. In the first, most of the attendees are ABDLs. They might be mostly men, wearing diapers and maybe acting as babies. A few might have mommies. Some might have grown up thinking that they were the only ones with these desires, and struggled to quit. In the second, most of the attendees are ageplayers. That is, adults who roleplay as different ages. They might mostly be women acting as little girls, often with men acting as their daddies. This combination is called Dominant Daddy/little girl (DD/lg). More generally, roles would be divided by age; littles, middles, and bigs. They might have been introduced to these practices by a partner, at a BDSM dungeon, etc. Both parties would only include consenting adults. (Sex, bondage, etc., might also be present, although it might be restricted to a separate area.)

Two demographics

Tiidenberg and Paasonen (2019)[5] argue that ageplay is not indicative of diaper fetishism, paraphilic infantilism, or any other medical condition. Instead, it is one category of play on the BDSM spectrum. Ageplay such as DDlg uses roleplay as a power exchange. Power might be transferred to the male as daddy. Power might also be transferred to the woman as girl, brat, princess, etc. DDLg is not too far from mainstream patriarchy, yet still kinky and taboo enough to be exciting.

In contrast, ABDL interests are rarely acquired as kinks. Only 3% of ABDLs attribute their interests to exposure to adult diapers or ABDL-related themes[3]. However, ABDL women report an older average age of onset[3]. Additionally, diapers tend not have a central importance for ABDL women if their interests developed at a late age[2]. This suggests a demographic continuum between ABDL interests and ageplay.

Tiidenberg and Paasonen (2019)[5] also comment that ageplay is under-researched. However, there might not be much more than needs to be understood medically. The demographic contrast between ABDLs and non-ABDL-ageplayers might be cultural. Specifically, differences in the culturally-defined gender roles might result in a higher barrier against male littles[2]. For example, footed sleepers and "baby doll" nighties might commonly be sold among women's clothing. In contrast, a man looking for footed sleepers in his size might need to go into the women's section to get them. It could be speculated that this cultural threshold prevented many less-motivated male littles. As a result, a demographic contrast might be expected: A small population of strongly motivated men (e.g. by infantilism, diaper fetishism, etc.) and a larger population of women who enjoy ageplay, even if only as a matter of taste. (Non-binary individuals might have more complicated histories, influenced both by their own genders and by those assigned to them.)

The demographic trends observed among ABDLs - mostly men with desires starting at an early age, often is isolation (e.g.[4]) - are consistent with masochism, fetishism, or some other paraphilia. In contrast, the demographics of those who enjoy non-ABDL ageplay are not, which is consistent with having been exposed to ageplay themes or practices by chance, trying them, and liking them. However, it would be wrong to assume that these demographic trends apply to all individuals. Both populations include all genders and orientations, but at differing ratios. Similarly, both populations might include those with masochism or a similar cause for their desires, as well as those who simply enjoy it, although the ratios might be different.

One party

Our initial premise of going to an ABDL cartoon party and then to an ageplay cartoon party might be improbable: The two theoretically distinct populations might be more likely to only organize one common cartoon party. Any man, woman, or non-binary individual at these parties might simply have explored ageplay and enjoyed it. Alternatively, individuals might have paraphilic infantilism yet enjoy the more active toys, more engaging cartoons, etc. of older ages in play. Still other indivduals might have diaper fetishism and saw how much fun ageplayers were having at parties. In turn, previously non-ABDL ageplayers might adopt baby play as a way to be even less adult. There are many more potential transitions that might take place individually. Collectively, the overall result is a population that might reflect cultural influences and subcultural cuisines of practices, as opposed to any particular medical condition.

It is unclear if the communities will merge in the future. On the ABDL side, some individuals prefer the acronym AP/DL (AgePlayer/Diaper Lover). Ageplay is the more inclusive term. Most ABs identify as toddlers, and so techincally aren't babies[1]. On the non-ABDL ageplay side, many might have an aversion to diapers. Both might wish to avoid the pathologization associated with infantilism, and enjoy very similar parties.


- Updated:30 June 2024  1st:30 June 2024     

Do you have Questions, tips, suggestions, or other feedback?

[icon]  For More Detail:
  • Harrington, L., (2008). Toybag Guide To Age Play (Toybag Guides) Greenery Press reviewed here.
[icon] Books and Other References:
  1. Grey, B. T. (2008)AB/DL Survey #1 Part 5 Results Retrieved 30 June 2024, from http://understanding.infantilism.org/surveys/surveys/survey1_abdls_etc_part5.php#25
  2. Grey, B. T. (2008b)Girls, Boys, and Diapers Retrieved 17 Feb 2014, from http://understanding.infantilism.org/surveys/girls_boys_and_diapers.php
  3. Grey, B. T. (2009)Trauma and Exposure Among AB/DLs Retrieved January 25 2013, from http://understanding.infantilism.org/surveys/trauma_and_exposure.php
  4. Hawkinson, K., & Zamboni, B. D. (2014). Adult Baby/Diaper Lovers: An Exploratory Study of an Online Community Sample. Archives of sexual behavior, 43(5), 863-877.
  5. Tiidenberg, K., & Paasonen, S. (2019). Littles: Affects and aesthetics in sexual age-play. Sexuality & Culture, 23(2), 375-393.